It's Been A While and It's 1am

Here I am at the end of Christmas break. It was a delightful time of rest, some laziness, and lots of good food that was probably terrible for my body. I played my ?third show over break which was fun. I can't wait to get back to college and start practicing for the show I am most likely going to have sometime in February or March or April. I haven't decided yet.

Goodbye Youth Group, Worship Team, Parents, Highschool, Ignorance, Friends, and Spongebob

Well, I have less than a month left until I travel down with my mom to Arkansas and pack myself into a room with another person. Golly. Eleven whole hours away from home. Thankfully when I picked this college, I picked it because it felt like home to me.
Wow, "freedom" is almost in my hands. It's odd.

Graduation and Summer

Well, I am officially a high school alumni. It's bittersweet. I'm going to miss all my beautiful friends that I've made over the past four years, but then again, I have another four years at a new school and many more chances to make friends with more exciting new people.
In two weeks, I will be heading off to college (pre registration program), and hopefully I will meet someone who wants to be my roommate. I'm super excited to be on the JBU campus again. It felt like home when I visited it last October. Wow, time flies! It seems like just yesterday I was working at camp, then learning about JBU, and now I'm actually going there in August...how crazy is that??
Speaking of camp, I'm bummed that I don't get to go this year. I have to stay home and get summer job....that pays me. I just volunteered at camp last year. It rocked. I just want to go back and sleep in a cabin and play piano in chapel and pick flowers for Sarah and make a batch of monster cookies and play plunger ball and build beautiful relationships again. God truly created a little piece of heaven inside of that camp, and I yearn to go back to it....but I have to get a job :P
Maybe next year I can be a kitchen aide or something. Hmm.
Graduation was exciting! I got to read a poem I wrote in front of the biggest crowd I have ever talked to. What a rush! God totally allowed me to get through it without messing up :) Thank you, God! That night was one of the best nights of my entire high school career. It was just so cool having everyone I love around me, and all the speeches were inspiring, and the music was beautiful. I definitely loved the valedictory. The number one of the class of 2010 gave us a speech and it was awesome and funny AND inspiring. At the very end all of my classmates and I got to walk through a long line of all our teachers and hug them and thank them for all they have done. Mr. Herkelman gave me a big hug, so did Mr. O'Dell, whom by the way is moving back to Illinois to be an associate principal next year. Good for him! I'm so glad he's doing what God wants him to do. He especially has been a blessing in my life this past year. His room was a safe haven where I could go and be encouraged for the day.
Here's where I list the teachers who have especially helped me in my highschool career.
I will start with Mr. Moran. He was a great teacher. He always kept his classroom under control and taught people to appreciate others and not to discreminate. He taught me to be myself and have my own voice. He allowed for my creativity to flow, and he would say what he thought about my work which helped me in my writing and in my speaking. He definitely had a dry sense of humor and it was AWESOME! I really enjoyed his classes :)
I've already mentioned Mr. O'Dell. He rocked and was an awesome encouragement to me this past year. His room was definitely a place I could go to and just chill out and be myself. He taught me a lot about history, life, and God. If I did something for him, he would thank me and appreciate me for it which is my love language I've learned. That is one of the things we talked about is the love languages. He taught me a lot about myself and other people.
Next I would like to thank Mr. Grady for making me love an AP course. His AP Economics class is the best, and if you are going to be a senior next year at Kennedy, you had better take it, for it IS the best class you will have at Kennedy (in my opinion). His vibrant attitude always kept me awake even though it was the first class of the day. His teaching habits kept my work in line, too. I always did my homework for his class no matter what. He made the coursework interesting by being interested in it himself. He welcomed questions on the material and made me not afraid to ask questions in his classroom and in other classrooms as well, which stimulated my learning by a lot.
Mrs. Jones is the lady who got me interested in reading. She organized me and got me on the ball with my homework. This is the reason why: she didn't give any extra credit and she graded hard. Every single one of my works cited pages was never good enough. Haha! But that's okay, because it got me to read my work over and over again. She kept control of her classroom, too, even though she had some of the goofiest students with which to deal. From her, I learned to finish the projects that I started. Though she won't be at Kennedy next year, I hope she continues to change students at Harding the way she changed me.
Next I would like to thank Mr. Beall and Mr. Herkelman for believing in me that I could do math and excell in it. They both taught me in a way that I could remember the subject, and it didn't scare me out of my wits to speak up in Mr. Herkelman's class. They both had wonderful senses of humor which helps when it comes to "boring" subjects.
My next thank yous go out to Mrs. Steinmetz and Miss Suiter. They taught science in a way that interested me. In ninth grade, Mrs. Steinmetz really came along side me and helped me to receive my first "A" in science since the sixth grade. I have never been good at science and probably never will be (though I did get that math and science Air Force award....hmmm), but she helped me to see the world around me through fun projects and interesting pictures and videos. Miss Suiter was a friend as well as a teacher. She really loved the subject that she was teaching which helped me to find a love for it. We always had interesting projects to do in her class which really helped me to understand the criteria better. (I am a kinsthetic learner, so I LOVE projects.) I got to look at the moon and stars up close because of her star parties which was top neato for me. She also had a sweet sarcastic sense of humor which I really enjoyed.
Thank you to the art teachers Mrs. Ennis, Mrs. Walsh, and Mr. Scheumuker. You taught me to love art and to be creative. There was always a lot of encouragement and humor in your classrooms. Thanks to you, I've found that I love painting and critiqueing paintings. The museum in Chicago would never be as interesting without you.
Thanks to Mr. Barry Wilson for teaching me a subject that I thought I would never succeed at. I definitely learned a lot in Auto Tech, and I definitely succeeded in the class. Thank you for not giving up in me, and for not treating me like just another one of the boys. You made that class fun with your humor and your hands on learning.
Thank you to Mr. Benedict again for the FCA Lock-In; we could not have done it without you. Thank you for the hands on learning projects that we got to do in your class. I will always remember the Barbie project at the end of the year. Savages!
Thank you to Mrs. Elliot for teaching me how to use my voice and for telling me that my voice doesn't suck. I will always remember you and your sweet self behind the piano smiling at me.
Thank you Mr. Carolin for not only teaching me a different language, but also for giving me a lot of wisdom on life and relationships. You have been an encouragement through some rough times, and I will not forget your smiling face and New York-ian accent. :)
Thank you Mrs. Hrubes for being my AP Calc teacher and for getting me through. You are quaint and cute with your random outbursts of singing and math jokes.
Thank you Brooke Hoover for teaching me how to play guitar. It opened up a new world and a new love to me.
And thank you Mrs. Collins for encouraging me to be myself and follow my dreams. Your encouragement has opened up a whole new world of learning to me for the next for years, and I am excited.
That is the end of my thank you's and rememberances for right now. Kennedy was definitely the most awesome place to be for the past four years.

Prom

Dear Reader,
If you have ever attended a prom, you probably know that it is cut out to be one of the best nights of your high school career. In example, I prove this theory to be correct.
I had a lovely time at prom. This is all due to God who allowed the whole thing to go on like a beautiful sunset. He set everything into its perfect time slot and directed the night like a director would a musical. I had prayed so long and so hard about so many things that would go into the night, and He answered them with a beautiful hug from His fatherly hands.
The day was all in His hands (as it always is, but this time I especially took notice). I had a wonderful time looking at all the gorgeous dresses and faces around me. (The only icky thing about the night was the grindy music/dancing...yuck.) I had the pleasure of dancing with a very awesome friend of mine who flew to Iowa to be my prom date for the night. He rocks and I praise God for giving him safe travels to and from Iowa, and I praise God for my date's kind heart. It takes a really nice person to fly back from college to go to a high school dance the week before finals. He's sweet.
Another of my friends came back from college for the weekend to help me prepare for prom. She waited on me (literally) head and toe for six hours if not more. Spending the day with her made prom that much more special cause she's my bestie. She always makes me laugh even when I am in the darkest of moods and I always have fun with her. (...and always is NOT a hyperbole in this situation!) She has been there for me through thick and thin, and she was there for my prom, too, which was AWESOME! Thank you, God!
I got ready with my other friend who was very excited about the whole thing. I got to do her hair and she looked like a queen in her dress! We went to Biaggis with her date and another couple which was fun. After supper we drove separately to the dance. At Elmcrest, I met with my date.
It really really was a special evening. I wish the day would have gone by sooo much slower, so I could take it all in that much more better. But the memories I did get to make will stick with me for a long long time.
God bless you! Have a great day!

Bad Dream

I have to write this down somewhere.
I had a bad dream during my nap this afternoon; so bad that I knew I was dreaming, but I couldn't get myself to wake up from it.
I was walking out of Elmcrest Country Club as happy as could be, on my way to get ready for prom at my house, and I stopped by this area outside the auditorium at Kennedy High School. I saw my friend there just inside in the tech area right off the stage, and he was decked out in zombie makeup for the play Sweeny Todd, but he seemed to be part of the backstage crew. He beckoned me to come to him and his friends were all around him. My exboyfriend was there and he was dressed in a bright turquoise shirt, but he had the same makeup on. As I gave my friend a hug, all these people who were dressed as Sweeny Todd zombies began to flock around us. I ran out of the building and my exboyfriend yelled "get her!"
I was running across a big yard with trees like Daniels Park and there were people with white shirts digging in the dirt, and now that I think about it, it looked liked one of them was building a mud castle; they were all around the outside of the church, some further away than others. The mob of zombie people were getting closer to me. I yelled to all the digging people to get up and fight back, but they wouldn't and just kept digging.
Then somebody beckoned to me from the other side of the church (which looked exactly like the cathedral at John Brown). It was a man dressed in white. He yelled at me to get on the other side of the church. I saw the church and made it my mission to get on the other side where the light was shining and the big doors stood wide open. I ran, but my foot got caught in a big blue tarp which another man in a white shirt was setting out. The zombie people were beginning to surround me from every side, and I was soo close to the other side of the church but I couldn't run because my foot was caught.
It was then that I knew I was asleep, and I tried my hardest to wake up. I could feel my body on the other side of my dream, but it would not move and my eyes would not open. The zombie people kept getting closer and closer, and the last thing I remember were the colors white, yellow, and gray. Then my eyes opened and I was in my living room again.
My heart was beating soo fast. I got up and started writing a song on my piano about how the darkness is taking over the world and we as Christians need to stand up and share the light.
That is all. I think I understand my dream pretty thoroughly, but maybe not.

FCA LockIn and Stuff

So April has flown by, mostly due to all the busyness which has kept me occupied for the past however many months. This weekend comes close to first for the most hectic, awesome weekend of my life, but let me start at the beginning.
On April Fool's Day, instead of playing pranks, I lay in bed sick with a bad cold. It helped me to get some well needed rest before all the things I needed to get done. God certainly blessed my body by keeping me home to spend a day with my mom before a period of days when we wouldn't see eachother for more than a few minutes. (This is because God has blessed my mother with a job that keeps her active for 12 hours in a day. We prayed heartily for this job, and she loves it....most of the time. :] ) That day, my Uncle David and Aunt Joanne came and visited us to spend Easter time with my mom and my grandma. My brother Dan and his wife came over, and we all spent quality time eating pizza and talking about many different things.
The next day, Aunt Joanne and Uncle David left, and my family welcomed my Aunt Nancy and Uncle Bob into our house. Our quality time was spent discussing politics which is something that has started interesting me more and more (though I can only listen to so much at one point in time). I had a half day of school which was awesome! I always enjoy half days because there is so much more potential to do something in the afternoon. I think I spent most of my time cleaning the house and reading Anne of Green Gables (a newly found favorite of mine).
On April 3rd, I enjoyed the company of my dear friend Leah, who was back from college for Easter weekend. We shopped around at Half Price Books and West Music. Later we perused around in David's Bridal talking of weddings that are not happening and gaining funny glances from the bridal consultants. It was so much fun and really enjoy being in stores with soo many beautiful things to look at and critique. I went home to a wonderful dinner of ham and potatoes and biscuits, and it was delicious. That night I went on a (not-so)secret mission to buy my mom Easter candy at Target.
The next day was Easter--the glorious day when Jesus arose from the dead defeating sin and death and proving that He truly is God's Son. I woke up to an Easter basket full of Twix bars (another favorite) and a heart full of joy. Our church held a cantata service, which I always enjoy, and it was beautiful. I truly hope God spoke to the hearts of all the nonbelievers in the congregation that day through the singing of the cantata. It was awesome.
The next two weeks were spent planning and organizing the FCA LockIn that happened this past weekend. I was responsible for the musical worship and the message of the night. We invited Thad Joyce (the youth pastor at Maranatha Bible Church) to come and present the gospel. It's an amazing story because he had been waiting for this opportunity to come back to Kennedy and spread the Good News (being a former nonChristian Kennedy student). Isn't that awesome?! Nick and I gathered a couple five songs for musical worship. The songs were "Meet With Me" by Ten Shekel Shirt, "Beautiful One" by Jeremy Camp, "Every Move I Make", "Lord I Lift Your Name On Hight", and "Light the Fire".
The LockIn went really well, I hope that the message there impacted all the people who came. There were three testimonies given, and a lot of Good News shared to people. I stayed up all night, but there was a lot to occupy me with. I played guitar for a good chunk of it. There was a lot of activity that happened all night long. Only about 10 people out of 50 slept which is crazy! We played kickball at 3am! So good! The rest of the night was spent surrounded by a group of people listening to me play guitar and sing softly as they went to sleep. Clean up wasn't too bad either. But when I got home, I crashed. I slept from 8am to 2pm and then again from 6pm to 8:30 am the next day. It was great.
Now there's this event going on at my church called Spring Bible Conference where a speaker from outside of our church comes in and does a series of sermons on one topic for three days. This time a man named Dr. Ronald Allen is speaking on worship, which is such a gift from God. In my life, I've only ever really understood worship to be singing and playing instruments for God, so I hope I can learn other means of worshipping God with my body.
Yesterday, Dr. Allen talked about worshipping in Spirit and in Truth which comes from the heart. He told us that worshipping is "not about the state of the art, but about the state of the heart" which really stuck out to me. A lot of times while I am playing guitar for youth group, I am sadly just trying to sound good and not mess up, but God sees this as ugly, because my mind is not on Him.
Last night, I truly tried to play from my heart as worship team played three songs for the beginning of the sermon. It is soo much more wonderful when I am glorifying God, than when I am trying to sound good.
And with that, I will end because the passing bell is about to ring. Have a great day and God bless you!

This Past Month I....

So as you who might usually read my blog see...I haven't blogged anything for the past month. It most certainly has been a crazy awesome month. Three weeks ago, an exchange student from Japan came and lived at my house for a while. Her name is Nako and she is really sweet! We did a lot of "American" things like bowling, ice skating, eating fatty foods, and the last day the students were here, we went to the Mall of America. I had a blast with her and we taught eachother how to make different meals. She learned how to play some easy chords on guitar. We watched the Miyazaki film "Ponyo" with my friend Kelsey.
I can't wait to see that girl again! I hope I get to visit her in Japan sometime :)